Empowered to Connect Conference
A couple of weekends ago JB and I went to an adoption conference. I was very excited for many reasons but the main ones were: it's an adoption conference (AND I NEED TO LEARN EVERYTHING POSSIBLE ABOUT ADOPTION AND PARENTING,) it was local, and it was being led by the foremost leader in adoption: Dr Karyn Purvis.
It was amazing!
One wonderful part was that JB's parents were able to take care of the boys for 2 1/2 days so that we could focus on the conference. They even had them longer than we planned which meant we had some serious uninterrupted time to talk and process what we learned. (And go out for a date!)
About the conference: (Check out http://empoweredtoconnect.org/ for more information).
I learned so much.
Here are a few things I learned:
Setting expectations for both parent and child. The statistics show that for every year a child is in institutional care they are behind by 1/2 a year. So a child that is adopted at the age of 6 is really developmentally around the age of 3.
Creating connections. Kids from hard places have learned improper ways to be connected to people. It is even more important to teach, practice, and build on what healthy connections look like. Practice, practice, practice.
Love and have fun. All kids need to have fun. When kids are having fun and are creating positive memories, they are more able to learn and build connections intellectually and personally.
Do I feel ready to parent 4 kids? Um kinda. I know that just like the boys, our next two kids will need us to parent. (Loving, teaching, loving, teaching, loving, teaching....). As the presenters said, "it's not just love here or just teaching there. It's one followed immediately by the other."
Oh, and we also need a team of friends and family that is ready to walk this path with us and be OUR support system. So.... Who wants to join us on this adventure?
